Is that Jesus? NOPE! Chuck Testa!

Hey look… is that Jesus? NOPE! Just Chuck Testa of the Ojai Valley Taxidermy, California! Damn good job he’s done on this one, aye?

On the off chance that you haven’t seen the Chuck Testa meme yet and are not sure what that is all about, go ahead and watch the original Chuck Testa taxidermy commercial below. Note: Chuck Testa does not taxidermize pets, but if you have any dead messiahs you want to preserve in the most lifelike way possible, just send them his way.

I saw this picture of a guy wearing a t-shirt that said “There’s a picture of the prophet Muhammad on the back of my t-shirt.” on the front, and on the back, “Just kidding. Praise Allah!”

So I thought, what if…

There's a picture of the prophet Muhammad on the back of my t-shirt.

So… you get into a discussion with some Christians, assert that the Bible is full of contradictions and get asked for evidence. What do you do?

Try 10 minutes of Bible contradictions conveyed as cute animated quiz show. No guarantees you’ll be more persuasive, but this excellent vid just might sweeten the pill a teeny weeny bit. Enjoy!

Thank God for zombie movies

Thank God for zombie moves. Or rather, thank Jesus for zombie movies. Actually, thank the crackpots who wrote the Bible – they had a wonderful imagination judging by ’80s Hollywood standards.

One Nation Under God

Now this hilarious Pledge of Allegiance cartoon gives an interpretation of “One Nation under God” that I can agree with! Just think of how religion, and ergo ‘God’, tend to get in the way and screw up everything, from the rights of gay people to be together and live like the rest of us to our understanding of science and the world around us. You see what I mean?

If there’s any praying types out there reading this, could you kindly ask God to get off our backs for a millennium or two? Thanks!

Long live the First Amendment! The kids in this video sure know how to exercise their rights, and that “One Nation under nobody” during the Pledge of Allegiance sure did put a priceless look on the Mrs Principal’s face!

She can try and play it down to the girl being in kindergarten all she likes, but the fact remains that those two kids will soon be way smarter than she will ever be.

One Nation under nobody! Way to go guys!

Jesus had two dads - why can't I?

Indeed, why not? Why all the anger against homosexuals from the Christian camp?

I mean, come on! You say that Jesus – the same guy who rounded up twelve men who were willing to leave their wives behind to follow him – hates gays?

Read your Bible and you’ll see that the Jesus portrayed in its pages would have empathized with gays in the same way that he did with all other social outcasts, from lepers to prostitutes to tax collectors. So go out and love your neighbors – even the gay ones!

Prepare to believe in a Photoshopped world

Welcome to the Creation Museum.

• Live the history of Creation – seven wonderful days, magically compressed into a couple of hours.
• Visit the Garden of Eden, where children play in the shadow of benevolent dinosaurs and evil serpents talk down from forbidden trees.
• Learn how Noah heroically managed to fit millions of animal species into a tiny boat.
• Discover how unscrupulous Victorian archaeologists buried billions of fake fossils all over the planet in history’s biggest hoax.

Come along and enjoy a terrific day out for all the family. Just check in your brains at the door and prepare to believe in a fantastic Photoshopped world.

Religions really don’t have a clue when it comes to sex (with the happy exception of the Tantric practices, of course!).

They blab on about how abstinence is the only solution and how condoms actually make the AIDS crisis worse (and please don’t remind me that Prof. Green from Harvard says that condoms make you feel safer so you take more risks – by that argument, we shouldn’t wear seatbelts in our cars – and after seeing what they have made of the economy, why would you trust anyone from Harvard, anyway?).

But I digress.

In the midst of all the nonsensical babble, it is refreshing to see a church finally make a correct statement on the matter of sex. Refreshing, and hilarious!

A 4 inch tongue can bring a 6 foot man to his knees

This idea of the small overcoming the great set me thinking about the story of David and Goliath. Was it a metaphor for homosexuality after all? I wonder.

Why wait until you die to find out if you are going to heaven? Take our test now, absolutely FREE!

This test is virtually guaranteed to be 100% accurate, provided your result is ‘no’. Unfortunately, we are not able to make any warranty in the eventuality of a ‘yes’ answer. Thank you for your understanding.

Take a free test to see if you are dumb!